Thoughts For Jamie

Death, close to home

2011-03-28T17:32:00.000+08:00

Its such coincidence that I was just blogging about dealing with death in the last post.

My grandma lost her battle to cancer, and passed away peacefully in March.

There were too much memories and time that we shared together, growing up in the same home under one roof.
Those evenings we spent playing with my cats and kittens and dogs. A kind soul like her, she cared for every single stray cat or dogs that came by our house.

The brilliant mind at home, she can fix anything despite not having proper education. I do miss her.

I can stil find myself welled up whenever I speak of her.

May you rest in peace.

I'm back

2011-03-28T17:27:00.000+08:00

Back to blogging once more. On mobile this time !

Nasi Lemak x 2

2010-01-18T23:24:00.003+08:00

Oh why oh why.

I can feel the warmth ozzing out of the banana leaf and the smell of newspaper kept me on a high.
What is better than a original nasi lemak that comes in a nicely folded pyramid?
Quarter of an egg, salted ikan bilis, a spoonful of sambal and voila!

Simply heavenly.

Bing?

2009-10-27T21:26:00.002+08:00

Wonder what Microsoft would think of this? Move aside, Google. Welcome Ayam Bing. =)

Random Thoughts

2009-10-22T21:15:00.000+08:00

There's a line called Limit.
We don't draw this invisible line, but one has to adhere to it.

To find understanding and respect for each other is like finding the perfect soil to grow your seeds in. If it was about pushing limits, I would like to ask why is it necessary?

Just so the strongest thrive? Are we being such pessimists that we need to constantly push ourselves as well as others to see who rise and fall?

Personal challenge is necessary.

Death is taboo.
The recent weeks brought too many grim news, I find it hard to cope, even though I wasn't directly affected.

My blessings are with the family members coping with the loss. I can't say that I understand how they felt, but I just hope they have the strength and courage and peace of mind to cope.

-

2009-09-08T21:54:00.002+08:00

I find no purpose in my life.

-

2009-08-17T21:59:00.001+08:00

I'm just being competitive and pursuing what is right.

Of Time and Bomb

2009-07-17T23:33:00.003+08:00

What lies used to be a dead bomb but its ticking away now. What do I do to stop it? Why hadn't I leave this place with the when planted bomb when I had the chance to? Why even venture into that place knowing there was a bomb planted there, even though it was dead.

Out of curiosity? How much time do I have?

Life is about taking risks, they say. Take especially the wrong ones, I'd say. When does the learning stops? We get experience from all the wrong moves we make, but where does it end? How do we know we came out the better, and not repeat the same mistakes again and again?

Whoever came out with this "learning process" must have been very successful in the marketing business for being able to "package" even bad experiences nicely.

Californication

2009-07-13T19:38:00.004+08:00

With all of the world's countries big and small, developed or post-war weathering the global economy turmoil, none of the countries can say they were unaffected by the inevitable. Businesses nowadays do not fight for the bigger size of profit. They were simply fighting to stay alive. Where once it touted as sure-windfall to strike a deal with the Government, perhaps it is not now.

Never would anyone imagine reading the headline that says "Iceland Goes Bankrupt".

California too, is at the brink of a financial meltdown with the State issuing mass IOUs to businesses who maintain contracts with the state of California. There is some kind of irony that the once sure-getter will not be paying businesses in monetary terms, but issue papers instead to buy time for recovery. As for us, we are not really affected by the global meltdown. Or so we think. Either that or we we clearly have been disillusioned by the media cover up and still think "It's not THAT bad".

However it's not all gloom. We welcome another California. No, not another state in the United States, but this California:

Ferarri California

In a twist of irony, the same name tells a very different story.

P@sSw0Rd

2009-06-26T18:11:00.005+08:00

Sometimes we are the victims of our own creation.

What's the use of uber up-to-date security measures that came in the form of Passwords when after all the painstaking implementation and forcing poor staffs to remember MORE passwords (also more advanced patterns needed - involving symbols, numbers and caps? And throw in at least 10 cycles before a password can be reused?)

We have our workaround to this too. Write those passwords down and leave it lying around the desk or better, stick on the monitor for easy reference, to avoid the hassle of having it reset by a third-party helpdesk (I email you you email my boss my boss email back to you) which is obviously involves alot of work and TIME and any time consuming redundant process that directly affect work productivity will then affect our KPI and subsequently our Bonus. That's alot to risk.

My vote, write them down. Yes. That's my vote.

Endless Spirals

2009-06-18T22:01:00.003+08:00

I rarely write about my dreams anymore. I can't seem to remember them like I used to in detail. Makes me wonder if I've lost that ability? Like all others, I don't always know what's coming ahead of time. Like the rest of us mortal souls, we can only see what's ahead when we go round the bend. Come what may, I always tell myself, what's more important is the capacity and ability to cope and deal with whatever the Higher powers may throw at you.

Life stories can be very interesting, the worse it is the better; people are willing to spend hours listening to you. Of how much crap can one take, how bitch people can be, and how shitty people make your life and the list goes on. On the other hand, listening to someone telling how they overcame shitty situation is indeed a bore. Instead of enlightening, people might even think of you as a self-absorbed.

People don't have to know how much you've gone through to understand and accept you as a person. You don't have to be bitter and feed off sympathy to make your life interesting. You know your worth and no one should ever pull you down from where you once stood tall.

We can never prepare ourselves for what's yet to come, but we are in full control on how we want things to proceed.

Whispering Devils

2009-06-08T21:30:00.003+08:00

Angels and Demons was a good one.

I've been wanting to watch this but don't seem to be able to find time. I'm getting the dosage of break I need now out of TL-ness. So I get to slack everyday and not worry about work until the end of the month.

I realised that I have got used to the daily routine of waking up each day, get out of bed, leave the house and get myself on the roads, just like tens and thousands of other people get stuck in the daily crawl.

When I take a break, I find myself still thinking about work, worry about not going to bed early, worry about not getting enough rest, had some voices in my head telling me tomorrow's a work day and all the anxieties that come with it. It's annoying. Very annoying.

Now that I've got what I needed, to leave all the thoughts at work behind, I seriously need to get my mind Off it.

May the dark force be with me.

We Never Change

2009-06-04T21:18:00.001+08:00

I wanna live life and never be cruel.
I wanna live life and be good to you.

And I wanna fly and never come down.
And live my life and have friends around.

We never change, do we? no, no
We never learn, do we?

So I wanna live in a wooden house.

I wanna live life and always be true.
I wanna live life and be good to you.

And I wanna fly and never come down.
And live my life and have friends around.

We never change, do we? No, no
We never learn, do we?

So I wanna live in a wooden house,
where making more friends would be easy.

Oh, and I don´t have a soul to save.
Yes, and I sin every single day.

We never change, do we?
We never learn, do we?

So I wanna live in a wooden house,
Where making more friends would be easy.
I wanna live where the sun comes out ...

Random Blabs

2009-05-24T23:52:00.003+08:00

I recently read a note written by a friend somewhere online. It struck me instantly, on how people change over time; that with each event that took place in one's life, we're slowly changing. We will never be the same person we used to be, whether we like it or not because every single thing you experienced in life leaves a mark in you.

Things happen. We forgive, forget and get over it. Back to square one, or so you thought. Every square one might not be the same as before. Because as a person, we grow. It's a constant process and it's not in our control to stop changing.

We sometimes fail to understand events that take place in our daily lives, people's reactions, choice of words, every conversation you've had, every single person you knew, strangers alike,how things unfold they way they did.

Beyond control they were.

It's up to us to not let ourselves be affected.

Oit, DONE!

2009-05-22T22:27:00.002+08:00

Sometimes we got so engrossed in work that we forgot the very essence of quality time and the corporate world humour.

We work with impossible bosses with impossible deadlines. Impossible deadlines means losing your sanity and when you have a bunch of cockoo people, things don't go in a straight line.
On top of that throw some of the most impossible people ..

"I want this, yesterday."

"Meeting starts at 9. If you're here at 9, you're late."

Impossible deadlines puts everyone under pressure. This is a chain reaction. Your boss give you impossible deadlines because his boss is giving him the same impossible deadline, if not worse. So he's simply "cascading" his pain to you, and subsequently you to others.

I want this line and this paragraph to be amended. Change all the reports.
1 months later (testing included), DONE!

We need to change this field, change the layout, change the colours. We need to interface with this this and this to get maximum slice of the pie! Get this done, no matter what.
3 weeks later, DONE!

I am not happy with this. We're incompetent. We need to revamp this entire system. Find a replacement.
DONE!

You will notice how different things used to be and how things are now. Small things used to take longer time to be completed. As time goes by, the more impossible, the more massive the project size, the shorter time it takes. We don't like things to complicate things and we like to keep the peace.

DONE. DONE. DONE.

The Laws of Attraction

2009-05-22T22:08:00.006+08:00

I don't know how to explain this.
In Hokkien, they call it "miao yen".
In Bahasa Melayu, "Jodoh Kucing"?
In English, I haven't figured out a term for this yet.

Honestly, have you ever been stared at by cats?

This cat actually came running when I was walking up the stairs while holding a can of 100Plus in hand. Okay this one didn't stare at me, he was looking at that can of 100Plus. Guess cats don't just live in a place, they behave like they should be. Badminton Hall resident the blue eyed cat.

God.

Mamak cat. Can't even see the face. He walked over when I took a seat at one of the chairs. -_-

Is this getting ridiculous?

I realise its not food. Cos I wasn't eating or having any food source with me. Or do I smell like food?

Either they stare or they give me this look.

Other's will give me this. Back rubs and rolls.

What do you think?

Outrageous

2009-05-19T11:28:00.002+08:00

I'm sitting in this hall listening to a lot of crap. I couldn't keep count of how many times I rolled my eyes.

It's no doubt that everyone is affected by the slowdown in the economy, white collar workforce not spared. Even though The mothership Did not face direct hit, but everyone seem to be jumping at chances to blame it on the economy and make some quick cash.

I'm absolutely TL.

Find me a readable piece of news

2009-05-12T17:06:00.002+08:00

Do we get more insights when we observe hard enough?
Or does it come quite easily? Just a glance?
Or do we always act smart and always think that we were right about everything?

A wound might heal over time.
A scar remains for the rest of your life.

There are things I don't know how to deal with.
It's far beyond what my current state of mind is capable of.
Or so I thought.

I've got some thinking to do.

See ya.

Winds of Change

2009-05-12T16:46:00.003+08:00

We don't know what space looks like.
Where's the starting point and where exactly is the end point.
Scientists claim that it's expanding and accelerating as days go by.
New planets are discovered, way beyond our solar system.
Could there be another planet like Earth?

Weather's gone crazy
Wild fires, flood, storm and drought
Humanity fighting new diseases and viruses
People dying
Lakes are drying
Glaciers melting
Oceans rising
Nothing is as predictable anymore.

Is it time for us to be responsible for the damage we've done to our planet?

Mud Pot

2009-04-29T20:04:00.003+08:00

I don't know how to deal with this.

Was it the unimaginable pain in the past that made me the me today?

Scars

2009-04-20T23:24:00.002+08:00

Life events are things that aren't things you can forget.
Painful past experiences somehow leave a deeper scar.
But so does every other events, they leave a mark somewhere in your memory.
They can't be erased. You live with it for the rest of your life.

So what does it mean when people say they're Over something?
It simply meant you got over that particular event, that it
does not hurt like it used to.
You are able to talk freely without getting emotional.

That's getting over something.

But like I said earlier, these memories aren't erased.
Some point in life later, you can still find yourself recalling the moments
when you heard songs, saw things, go to places that reminded you of the past.
You find that you're still able to recollect those memories.
In full detail.

The difference now is that, past events were already in the past.
At that point of time, there are things to be told, things to clear before you can move on.
Not everyone can practise this, and they rather leave it in the dark, or chose not to deal with it.
Time can tell a story.
Time can heal alot of pain.

But if you choose to avoid, it's never going to solve itself.

What is Wrong?

2009-04-17T00:13:00.005+08:00

Disclaimer: This post is aimed at an individual and not the organization as a whole. It does not claim to contain defamatory details and thus the author shall not be held liable for any discomfort or self guilt. Also note that all persons are NOT fictitious.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

pissed-me... (9:43 AM) xxx1
pissed-me... (9:43 AM) was wondering if you can send a few deals and also cancel them
xxx1... (9:44 AM) I will do it around 10am today
pissed-me... (9:44 AM) okay
pissed-me... (10:20 AM) xxx1..
pissed-me... (10:20 AM) sent?
xxx1... (10:21 AM) not yet.... I'm working something on the DR Server now.
pissed-me... (10:21 AM) so when can you send
xxx1... (10:21 AM) 10:30am please
pissed-me... (10:22 AM) ok\
pissed-me... (11:00 AM) in yet?
pissed-me... (11:18 AM) give me a time when you are convenient
pissed-me... (11:18 AM) cos i need to send the deal logs
pissed-me... (11:23 AM) xxx1
pissed-me... (11:23 AM) need your cooperation
xxx1... (11:23 AM) hold on....please I have some urgent matter to attend now.
pissed-me... (11:27 AM) for how long
xxx1.. (11:27 AM) not sure yet
pissed-me... (11:28 AM) give me a time
pissed-me... (11:28 AM) production?
xxx1... (11:28 AM) yes...
pissed-me... (11:28 AM) who else can help me send deals
pissed-me... (11:29 AM) xxx2 ok?
xxx1... (11:29 AM) she is tied with another testing now
pissed-me... (11:31 AM) xxx3?
pissed-me... (11:31 AM) or only u can send?
xxx1... (11:31 AM) all of us are tied with various testing now
pissed-me... (11:32 AM) then why you tell me 1030
xxx1... (11:32 AM) Something pop up
pissed-me... (11:32 AM) so just tell me whn can i expect you to send a deal
xxx1... (11:33 AM) just try this afternoon....
pissed-me... (11:33 AM) its for the setting for our production testing
pissed-me... (11:33 AM) i need to provide vendors with the logs
pissed-me... (11:33 AM) cancellation from k+ are not reflecting in our prod
xxx1.. (11:33 AM) sorry. I can't help you now
pissed-me... (11:33 AM) how long does it take to send a few deals
pissed-me... (11:34 AM) believe it wont take much of your time
xxx1... (11:34 AM) please leave alone me now.... I need time to think my problem now...

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

KNNCCB. What tactful reply was that?

Anyway my problem became his cos all I have to do is just cc the necessary people. Do we have to go to that extreme to get things done? What about building some people relation amongst team mates? I guess for this individual, it just didn't happen. I need to be mean and obsessed with getting my things done, one way or the other. So screw you.

What's in a Password?

2009-04-11T22:49:00.002+08:00

Truth to be said, I am one unhappy owner of at least 8 passwords (or so) I needed in order for work to progress smoothly.

And not to forget the tediousness of having to request for my passwords to be reset via 'proper channels', the amount of time it takes to relay from one party to another to finally come a full circle back to me.

Some geniuses came up with password creation policy, which is an oxymoron. Oxymoron. Why you'd ask? Isn't that necessary to ensure that strong passwords are created for maximum security?

Hello there. It works when you have only ONE password to remember.
When you have 8 fancy different passwords, I think people spend more time sending reset ID forms rather than spend it doing what they are paid to do.

Plus, when you keep sending reset ID forms to your boss the whole day to reset different passwords, it only make sense that they get annoyed too.

So, we the concerned employees, will resort to writing them down (on papers, notebooks, STICKY NOTES) and place them on the desk, for convenient reference.

It defeats the security purpose right away, no?

On another note, here are some funny passwords I came across.
It's funny how we are 'guarded' with fancy password creation policy (most of the time obliged to)
They are pretty fed up with it. So fed up with the matter that they get expressive:

User ID: ******66
Password: mangkuk3

*LOL*

Totally Annoyed

2009-04-11T22:45:00.002+08:00

We, the citizens of this country can call ourselves the victim of bad leadership.
Everywhere we turn, we see non-competent people leading the pack.
What's with the satay-ing culture of pleasing a**holes who cared about nothing but profit?

What about the 80mio fiasco of running only 33 laps?
Ouch. That stinging wound sting real bad.
We, the taxpayers funded that fiasco we have no say over.
Was the Meteorology Department not relevant in reversing the decision?
What about the drivers concerns?
After all, they are the ones driving this event.

Bah.
Just plain satay-ing.

Cloudless Sky

2009-03-23T18:32:00.003+08:00

I want to fly like a plane on a cloudless sky, leaving my vapour trail behind, just long enough before it slowly spirals into oblivion, leaving nothing for nobody to pick up where I took off.

-

2009-03-14T11:09:00.003+08:00

May you rest in peace.

Walao Ehhhh

2009-03-03T22:19:00.001+08:00

This evening, had been Terrific.

The traffic was so bad, I took more than 30 minutes just to get out of the carpark. Something is really wrong with this city, looking at how bad the jam was. I took a total of 2 hours to get home.

Just to get home!

If I hadn't forget my staff tag today, I wouldn't be stuck in this mess.

IF I HAD NOT FORGOTTEN!

Bah...

Hello There

2009-02-24T23:09:00.006+08:00

The world is moving at break neck speed.

So many years had passed. Where am I now?

Am I getting there?

Where would I go from here?

Am I trusting what I am believing now?

Changes

2009-02-19T00:08:00.003+08:00

People are generally uncomfortable with changes.

It's hard to accept a change, when all your life had been organized in a certain way.

A change is necessary to help you adapt to the situation.

As you slowly embrace the change over time, why is it so hard for people to accept the changes you've made?

Are they reluctant?

Are we just plain stubborn?

Ungodly Hour

2009-02-16T22:56:00.005+08:00

Don't talk, don't say a word
Cause your eyes they tell me more than your words
Don't go, don't leave me now
Cause they say the best way out is through

And I am short on words knowing what's occurred
She begins to leave because of me

Her bag is now much heavier
I wish that I could carry her
But this is our ungodly hour

I know you're leaving now
Cause i held on to my way tightly
Stay still until you know
Tomorrow finds the best way out is through

And i am short on words knowing what's occurred
She begins to leave because of me

Her bag is now much heavier
I wish that I could carry her
But this is our ungodly hour

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Love this song. Just love this song.

Circles of Life

2009-02-16T20:56:00.004+08:00

I haven't been updating my blog for a while. So many things had been happening in my life that needed attention. Majority of my time were spent at work. Work poured in endlessly. Just the daily grind we called Life.

People under pressure were generally cranky. They get short tempered. Anything can tick them off. I find that rather amusing, I like to pull their triggers. Those little things make me laugh. I have my fair share of worries and things to take care of, to finding a way to amuse myself about all that fuss makes it easier to swallow.

It makes life more colourful too.

I came to a point in my life where I start see the bright side of things like never before.
There had been a few rollercoaster ups and downs, but I managed to ride out them nasty waves. There were hardships to deal with on a more personal aspect of life. With all the joy and fun comes the cold hard reality. It really bites when it bites.

It takes a lot to understand what your own needs are.
It won't be a straight line race to the finish line.
It's not a straight line race and I am racing against it.

Having Hope gives something to look forward;
Having Faith solidify the aim of making things happen;
most importantly, to have complete Trust is the foundation we will be building a future on.

Walk On

2009-01-31T22:21:00.003+08:00

Tranquility

There were moments of indecision.
To do or not to do.
Again, I was doing things based on feelings alone.

There were tough moments.
There were moments I broke down.
But this time around, it was easy to see where the thorn was.

I'm walking on thin ice and feeling oddly good about it.

Happy Chinese New Year

2009-01-31T21:22:00.003+08:00

Happy Chinese New Year.
It has always been the time of the year where I look forward for family dinner, gatherings, social gambling and social boozing.
(wth.. hate it or not, little bit of alcohol creates the warm atmosphere and it gets people talking!)

This time around, it'll be a very memorable one.
There were moments.
But I'll be smiling.

=)

Have a good one, people.

Looking Back

2009-01-12T19:20:00.004+08:00

This is the year that was, 2008.

It had been a rollercoaster year.
There are things that I've done wrong, I could have done it differently.
There were no regrets in any of the events that took place in the course of 2008.
I've learnt to trust my gut feelings, instead of obeying the logical mind behind this face.
I've also accepted that there are things that you can't explain by words alone.
There is more to it than words can describe.
I learnt to trust my feelings.
Like I never did before.

I used to be a logical thinker.
Things must be practical, backed by facts and visuals.
It had always been that way.
It had been like that because of my upbringing.
I was taught that feelings alone will not get you what you want.
There are still room for occasional bursts of impulsive acts.
Spontaneity is still very much part of me.

For a better 2009. Cheers. Happy New Year everyone.

Happy New Year

2009-01-02T10:23:00.002+08:00

Happy New Year everyone.
how's the celebrations?

Mine was superb. I Overslept and missed the fireworks. In a haste I grabbed my camera and went out only to realised I left out my memory card.

Gah...

Would you believe that? Anyway I can get a good view from my place, can see the one at Genting and various parts of KL. Just missed the perfect photo opportunity, cos I did not do my homework and slept instead.

Anyway, here I am sitting at the airport waiting for the next flight out cos I Overslept. Read again: Overslept. Gah. Signs showing, I'm getting old. I blame the good weather and too much sleep the evening before. Sigh.

Happy New Year, folks.

(licking my own bitter wounds for not being punctual. And definitely paying a hefty price)

$

2008-11-20T21:22:00.004+08:00

There are things money can't buy.

Civilised, at last

2008-11-20T20:54:00.002+08:00

It's been a long time since I last took a ride on the Putra LRT. A year or two perhaps? I'd rather get stuck in a jam within the comforts of my car rather than swimming in a sea of pits and foul smelling coaches. Gah.

Call me spoilt.

I was at Masjid Jamek station just two days ago. The newly renovated station makes a clean appearance. Except that its abit deserted, and no one knows what to do with the extra spaces; other than the illegal street hawkers. Same old escalators, same ticketing counters, just as many people as before. Nothing has changed, aye?

As I waited for the escalator to reach the platform area below, I was speechless. Did I see lines? As in people waiting in lines to get on the train. Hey, this is by far the most civilised of Malaysians I've ever seen! Everybody was waiting patiently in line, no one was getting edgy, frustated and making a scene out of the long wait. No grunts, no sighs.

All they need is a Rapid employee shouting orders at people; assessing the situation and directing them to shorter lines. All they need was one man with a Loud voice.

Switching to trains anytime soon?

Blue Skies

2008-10-13T00:17:00.005+08:00

You say you don't discriminate, but you do mind if one of your friends get involved in one. Isn't that indirect discrimination? You can't bring yourself to accept your friend's decision to get involved; cannot bring yourself to accept their choice. Then you decide to play God, and decide what is right and what is wrong, what should be done, and what shouldn't be done.

Before anyone can ask for acceptance, they should be able to justify their decisions. It doesn't mean that you are obliged to hold yourself answerable to everyone, the public, the society on all questions regarding this particularly sensitive issue. Even though you owe no one any explanation, you still need to be able to explain to yourself.

It's about being able to explain yourself; why you chose to be; and why you want to be; and not expecting everyone to be seeing things on the same plane immediately.

What do you know about acceptance?

Distinctively Yours

2008-10-11T18:38:00.005+08:00

There are things that must be clear cut. No in between. No compromise.

A Cambodian couple decided to saw off their house into half after a divorce. -.-"

Now, tell me about clear cut. That's a whole new level of divorcing.

Source:

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20081010/ap_on_fe_st/as_odd_cambodia_unique_divorce

Take My Hand

2008-10-05T12:10:00.003+08:00

Life is a rigid, sequentially executed list of programs.

Fresh out of your mother's womb, learn to crawl, learn to walk, learn to talk, learn to talk back, go to school, secondary school, college, university, get a boyfriend, get married, have kids, educate them. etc etc etc. Lastly wait for the Grim Reaper to come for you.

This cycle has been passed down for countless of generations.

Breaking the preprogrammed guide on how one should live their lives seemed out of norm. People don't usually do that; often brushed it off saying why should anyone challenge something that were proven to work after so many generations?

Lack of faith in Novelty? Or were they simply afraid to thread off the beaten path?

Do we require formality in ALL things? These are not business deals. Not something you give, take and sign papers. With money back guarantee? God.. These are real feelings we're talking about.

They are just going through the motions, perhaps?

Selamat Hari Raya, Malaysia

2008-10-02T11:11:00.003+08:00

The thing about us Malaysians is that, we really do forgive and forget.

Wait a minute, I don't think it happen very often, but at least we will do that in the spirit of any festive celebration in the country, provided there are 'rumah terbuka' - whereby endless sumptuous spread of festive food is served - FREE OF CHARGE.

No one felt uneasy about race relations; damn right we aren't, we've been living together for the past how many years? 51. We still don't know how to disagree rationally. It was because some idiots decide to question differences and make it their agenda to save their own sorry ass, we have to live through hell created by them.

Free food = Good crowd

So, did anyone get me any ketupats from Pak Lah's open house feast?

Selamat Hari Raya, maaf zahir dan batin.

Accuracy of Death

2008-10-02T02:29:00.002+08:00

How would you feel if you were to find out that life and death is decided upon by one of the many Grim Reapers?

Who are they to decide who lives and who dies, based on their outlooks on your life which they don't have the slightest idea about, besides coming to claim your life when the time comes.

Seemingly plain and simple things can be important; it brings meaning and purpose to life.

Freedom Writers

2008-09-30T22:44:00.002+08:00

Haven't seen anything great lately on HBO, until this. A must watch.
To pen down the deepest of thoughts, feelings, suffering and pain in the raw is most honest.

"Justice doesn't mean the bad guy goes to jail, it just means that someone pays for the crime."

""I don't even know how this war started. It's just two sides that tripped each other way back. Who cares about the history behind it. I am my father's daughter and when they call me to testify, I will protect my own no matter what."

What Was

2008-09-30T19:48:00.002+08:00

A stretch of space separates us.

There were responsibilities,
choices and decisions.
There were moments of doubts,
empty spaces to fill.

I don't remember dreaming, for a while now
Was I contented with life that I need no help from within?

p/s: Happy Birthday! =)

Through My Eyes

2008-09-27T13:26:00.004+08:00

Most would agree that people see things differently, despite the fact that we see through the same organ of vision as everybody else: the eyes.

The difference relies on the depth of understanding, regardless of subject; abstract matter, object or simply, a person. The interpretation lies far beneath the eyes, the complexities that makes up the inner workings of the delicate gray matter. Part of it lies in the willingness of the individual to accept new ideas, to be indifferent to differences. It makes up the perception. Things that a person do and how it's done gives an insight of that person.

Can't expect the rest of the world to see things the way we see it.

We are here to complement each other.

Random

2008-09-27T12:36:00.005+08:00

Why does it gets worse when you get analytical?

What's with the formalized quest to be complete?

Or at least feel complete?

Was your own interests all that matters?

Do you feel responsible to change someone
to complete your puzzle?

Something is wrong with you when everything had to be done your way.

Lameness

2008-09-22T22:21:00.005+08:00

I never understand why the Government needed so long to finally realize that touts have been co-existing with legitimate counters for the LONGEST OF TIME.

I don't exactly know when touts started operating out in the open, but it was already there when I was still a student. That was 6-7 years back!

As usual, the Government will somehow manage to come up with a solutions whenever they need to impress.

Something like this.

Men in Black. So, does that make us aliens?

They look like touts themselves. Behhh tonnngggg!

Source:
http://thestar.com.my/metro/story.asp?file=/2008/9/22/central/2084146&sec=central

Over and Off

2008-09-20T11:07:00.002+08:00

I am embarassed by the things I blurted out of the mess in my head.
My head was spinning endlessly; I was lost in a myriad of my own thoughts as a result of all that spin.
It was spinning out of control before I managed to come back to my senses, and think with a clear conscience.

All I did was to question myself.
It wasn't hard to conclude; I certainly didn't like to be a part of a x = y equation either.
In an instance, the scattered pieces fell into place, I got overboard with my words.
I need to dump my head into the sand and remain there for a while.

When someone stops believing in themselves, it affects people who believed in them.

*paws...*

Sometimes all it takes is to put yourself in someone else's shoes.

May the Blind not lead the Blind

2008-09-19T19:24:00.010+08:00

I can tell you how some people can be so impatient/vicious.
They curse at phones, for ringing constantly.
They curse when people don't answer the phone.

Jalan jam, curse.
Traffic jam, curse.
Queue panjang, curse.
Potong queue, curse.

Double park, nevermind.
(as long as you don't block mine)

They get animated over inanimate objects.

It's no surprise Malaysians are an animated bunch of people, because our leaders are themselves birds of the same kind. The blind lead the blind.

Animated and twisted sarcasm.

Kiddy politics.

Don't test me, I shall place you under ISA arrest.

We shall cut ties with the blind leader and be a different kind of blind.

Drying Factor

2008-09-19T19:24:00.006+08:00

I sometimes have rather harmful thoughts.

While drying my hands with the infra red activated no-touch hand dryer, I had thoughts of the dryer blowing up in my face. The sound of the hot air blowing out of the little machinery was rather disturbing. My immediate reaction was to lean back a bit, bring my face farthest from the dryer, acting defensively. Such was my reaction to it.

I shall dig deep into my sanity to see what the above mannerism is trying to imply.

Look Away

2008-09-14T22:47:00.005+08:00

"Perhaps the person is simply looking for a piece of herself in someone else, and that person is not you. It doesn't mean that you aren't valuable, just that friends are made for many reasons, change over time and can come back together again when emotional and psychological transitions have been worked through." - July 31, 2008, CNN/Living

This particular phrase rang a bell.

Cheerios.

Same Same Difference

2008-09-14T00:25:00.004+08:00

Do we look for similarities?
Or do we seek differences?

Familiar things sometimes leads to assumptions.
There is no one in this world who is exactly the same as you are;
no matter how much you felt so.
People are unique despite similarities they carry.
Differences invite insecurities. But then again, it depends on how you look at it.
Insecurities are just the surface of things.

I celebrate diversity.

Blessings in Disguise

2008-09-13T23:40:00.004+08:00

My yet another brush with the mata.

I realized I am still bad at negotiations.
I paid too much attention in reading people's reactions, interpreting expressions before I try to say something. Even when all I need to do is just put my own interests first.

The word Settle didn't quite came out from my mouth.

@#%$#%$^$&^&

Thinking back, I was drowning in my own sea of emotions. It was quite a mess. Anger, disappointment; I was thinking of the aftermath, the chain of events that will come from it, and you people's safety, TL. Fearful, I don't know. I just didn't know which to express at that point of time.

Proved to be costly.

Nonetheless, still a great evening.

Thanks Nok Jie and Z.

The Appropriate Ding

2008-09-13T22:43:00.005+08:00

I have a habit of talking about things on the surface.
Like the water mosquito, gliding on the surface of the water without breaking the water molecule tightly bonded together.

When cornered, I do not brush things off, but I can reason with you, and most of the time, it made sense.
As impulsive as I am, it is sometimes quite hard to get me to do things against my will.
But it was not in a non-sensible manner.
My mind is a logical mind (i.e. I think with facts and figures; though not entirely exclusive)

I have been tingling jiggling and fiddling with it.
I embarrassed myself for showing so little respect for it.
I've got my fair share of scoldings and nagging that I should do it: the conventional way.

It's high time I take things seriously now. I had been subconsciously suppressing all the thoughts of it, in fact I have never gave it a second thought. I just brushed them off as irrelevant.

I'm gonna learn to play the ...

Triangle |>

This ...

Eh ... What were you thinking?

Purr

2008-09-09T21:46:00.004+08:00

I am fighting what's left of my internal demons.
It feels like I'm going into a relapse.
I'm still gonna fight with my soft pink paws. *paws*

Learning to let my guards down for a while.

Grrahhh..

Grey Room

2008-09-09T21:37:00.003+08:00

Well I've been here before
Sat on the floor in a grey grey room
Where I stay in all day
I don't eat, but I play with this grey grey food

Desolé, if someone is prayin' then I might break out,
Desolé, even if I scream I can't scream that loud

I'm all alone again
Crawling back home again
Stuck by the phone again

Well I've been here before
Sat on a floor in a grey grey mood
Where I stay up all night
And all that I write is a grey grey tune

So pray for me child, just for a while
That I might break out yeah
Pray for me child
Even a smile would do for now

'Cause I'm all alone again
Crawling back home again
Stuck by the phone again

Have I still got you to be my open door
Have I still got you to be my sandy shore
Have I still got you to cross my bridge in this storm
Have I still got you to keep me warm

If I squeeze my grape and I drink my wine
Coz if I squeeze my grape and I drink my wine
Oh coz nothing is lost, it's just frozen in frost,
And it's opening time, there's no-one in line

But I've still got me to be your open door,
I've still got me to be your sandy shore
I've still got me to cross your bridge in this storm
And I've still got me to keep you warm

Warmer than warm, yeah
Warmer than warm, yeah
Warmer than warm, yeah
Warmer than warm, yeah

=)

Good Morning

2008-09-02T22:06:00.006+08:00

This morning.
27,000 feet.

On Friday, I was in Paradise.

I'm so lazy to write ...
So for one post, please allow me to be lazy..

Life is

2008-09-02T00:04:00.004+08:00

Multicoloured

Gawk

2008-08-31T11:14:00.007+08:00

Cotton Hugs

I was surprised at the words that came out from her. She must have done a lot of thinking. Given the time she has to herself, I wasn't surprised at how far her imagination takes her, but I was stoned when she conveyed her thoughts at dinner table. It revolves around Life, Death and many other unfortunate events.

I was confused.

It struck in many way and I find myself overwhelmed by the mixture of emotions; was unsure which to react to and I was left dumb founded.

I didn't know what to believe. It was scary. Perhaps Death is still a taboo subject, I don't think I can openly discuss about it without being rattled. Regardless of whom it affects. A part of me just feels drained.

*

I watched V for Vendetta for the n-th time. I love the lines. I like the way V spoke. It was fictional, yes, but still it was brought to life in such a way that got me hooked and will continue to watch it for n times to come.

Happy National Day, Malaysia.

On and On

2008-08-26T21:28:00.005+08:00

The rain had not been such a blessing.

The temptation to just fall asleep at work in such cool weather is so difficult to resist.

Me: Hello..Good morning.
Guy: Eh, hello. Wanna ask you something about this. I have been having problems. I can't see the rates panel..I've tried everything, logging in and out, rebooting my computer but still I can't see it.
Me: How long has this been happening? And can I have your Id please?
Guy: Not quite sure. The last time I logged on was last month, so perhaps my colleagues had been using it. Usual thing, I just had my password reset yesterday. Too many passwords to remember.
Me: Yeah too many passwords to remember, and they expire at different times. At least 8. Okay, I've checked your Id, you should be able to see this this and this. Which is missing?
Guy: I'm seeing none of those you mentioned.
Me: (-__-") That's odd. Is any of your colleagues experiencing the same thing? Very much appreciate it if you can check with them.
Guy: Okay. Hold on a sec.

1 minute later ...

Guy: Hello hello .. theirs are working fine. They can see all the panels.
Me: Okay. In that case, I will need to raise a ticket stating your problem and have them check the settings for you.
Guy: Eh. Like that ar. Eh wait. Since they are gonna check it anyway, can you just use my ID and log in?
Me: We're not authorised to do that.
Guy: I'll give you my password. It's Geram@455.
Me: What?
Guy: Geram. G.e.r.a.m.@.4.5.5.
Me: Geram tuu.
Guy: Frustrated sebab kena tukar password selalu. Dan lepas tukar pun lupa selepas satu hari.
Me: Okay, I'll see what I can do. But pasal password, I tak leh tolong.
Guy: I'm learning to live with it. And thanks!

A very small part of my job is to make people's day. And it often swing both ways. =)

Test Water Dulu

2008-08-26T21:12:00.003+08:00

I want to laugh at such shallowness.

What is so hard to push a bit harder?

No no, not push you around. The f-ing door.

We cannot tolerate such chienness.

My Brethren, Ants, we shall carry this edible matter out of sight.

I am

2008-08-24T00:30:00.005+08:00

Testing.....
This is live blogging from my mobile. Pretty convenient.

It is difficult when options aren't really options. It's worse when you were made to choose one out of the non-options.

At a point, you will just need to make that non optional decision, and make up a big fat white lie out of thin air just to make things right.

One cracked brick won't bring the entire Great Wall of China down. But when one faulty component is consistently battered by the elements, it soon give way. It's easier to mend than to rebuild the wall.

P/s: Thanks for coming. =)

Unknowingly

2008-08-18T23:32:00.001+08:00

Let the wind carry the leave where it may.

Babbles

2008-08-18T00:14:00.003+08:00

I babble. Alot.

But we shouldn't worry about bringing certain topics up. It's not something we can avoid forever. Someday we'll have to face it. It's just a matter of sooner or later. I can't see how we can go around and bypass the whole process.

When it touches people at its core, that's when a babble is no longer just meaningless talks. We automatically switch from babble-mode to take a look at it more seriously.

The swiftness at which I go from babble-mode to serious is no surprising. I had always been like that.

I was Tagged!

2008-08-09T21:45:00.002+08:00

Rules:
1. Each blogger must post these rules first.
2. Each blogger starts with eight random facts/habits about themselves.
3. Blogger that are tagged need to write on their own blog about their eight things and post these rules.At the end of your blog, you need to choose eight people to get tagged and list their names.
4. Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’ve been tagged, and to read your blog.

Disclaimer: What I’m about to write is my personal opinion. Any objections to what I’m about to pen down, can be voiced out in the ‘comment’ page. Thank you.

1) My appreciation for music has gone to the next level. =)

2) Very much a thinker. I have a lot of time to myself.

3) I subconsciously watch Oprah everyday.

4) Chuck aside books that I find hard to read and only pick them up when I ran out of books to read.

5) PD (public display) of nose digging annoys me. A lot.

6) Sucker for Japanese food and Starbucks.

7) Is contented with life at the moment but never shut doors to new opportunities.

8) I'm a learner. Take chances, make mistakes. That's how you grow. Pain nourishes your courage. You have to fail in order to practice being brave.

Tagged:
1) Thamby!
2) Thamby's other half, the invi man *grins*
3) Zu can i tag you back?
4) TZ, you're the man.
5) kesatria gelap gas kecil tikus

Siapa siapa yang nak di-tag. Sila tag diri sendiri, and drop me a comment to read them. =)

Sniffs

2008-08-09T11:02:00.003+08:00

Where are the civil people?

If you do not take care of your customers, others will.

I had just came face to face with the most uncivilized foul mouthed man. Someone who was assigned to write a report on a fault that caused a major downtime on the system.

He dared ask me how I can tolerate my "Muhibbah" team; being the only Chinese there.
I shot him that cold stare the mata once gave me (hey I learned something from mata!) thought WTH?!

That very question really set me back 10 years in trying to understand why certain people just couldn't accept people from other walks of life.

Other than that, I just wanna slap him.

"I don't care about your damn settings, your damn servers and whatever damn configurations you have!"

Watch your language.

"You know what's the problem with you people? You cannot use that kind of mindset if you want to solve this thing."

We're not solving things here. This thing happened 1 month ago, and it's not the first time we explained to you what happened on that day. It was the third time you are asking for the same thing, and do you expect to walk in here saying you need this report by today, and expect all of us to stop whatever we are doing and help you finish up that report? this should be done a month ago. Do you see anything wrong here?

Problem with him was that he came with his bloody mindset of finding fault with the system so that he can save his own sorry a**. I chuckled when he angrily said that I was using my mindset against him.

Uncivilized tactics.

I was holding an print out with correspondences from Microsoft saying that there were things to be done post-deployment. Conveniently left out. It was as simple as 1+1 = 2. He made it sound as if it was 0/(x + y * z)= error.

Wtf.

But I was kinda proud of myself for not blowing my top and cooled off fast enough and counter him with facts.

We need more civilized Chinese people, don't we?

Thank you All.

2008-08-04T22:42:00.003+08:00

Hugs.

TL Factor

2008-08-04T20:17:00.005+08:00

If you follow my blog often enough, you will notice that I absolutely lorrhh mata.
And my brush with them today didn't mend anything.

So as usual, I was patiently stuck in a jam that was finally moving. I was so accustomed to the bad traffic that I have stopped complaining about it. It's an everyday thing. As common as potholes on the streets.

From my rear mirror, I can see white and blue rotating lights. *rolled eyes
Like how Moses split the Red Sea, that's the effect of the audio and visual warnings to other road users. Splitting for someone in a bloody car so much lesser than the divine. Bah.

I damn TL okay. Not like I'm gonna stop just because that bloody car is passing. I was moving along slowly since the rest had opened up enough for the entire convoy to pass. Then I heard this constant honking from behind, turns out it was one of the policeman on his expensive bike, angrily gesturing at me to STOP MY CAR RIGHT THIS MOMENT. Frantically "flapping" and pointing. Damn ahgua okay. You look ugly flapping in that white uniform. Gah.

I actually laughed at him flapping.

Then he shot me a long cold stare. *watch where you're going dude...

And then continue "flapping" and pointing.

I didn't slow down one bit. I so wanted to give him a finger. Damn flapping cop.

After his stuck up VIP drove past, so did he. If he actually stopped me and slap me with a saman, I'd be happier than to stop for him. Bloody hell.

Woi stop! *flaps and points

Stop or else! I shoot you arrrrrr...

*nah..

Operation Codename: Weathered

2008-07-23T20:59:00.008+08:00

It just dawned on my that the other thing that I use the word Hate to describe (besides potholes) is my AGE.

It happened so ridiculously often these days that I couldn't help but get really pissed.

You know lar, Pavilion is a place where you get all the high end products. Even common, cheap as dirt brands becomes high end all of an instance just because it was set up at the all-lavish Pavilion.

I've been hunting for a new phone for a while now, my current one have been giving me constant pauses and clicking noises. It annoyed my callers more than it did me. Muahah.

The other evening, I was at Maxis, and my smart phone plan did not work out. Wth plan was that? Sucks without a data plan. And its not worth paying so much for that bloody phone. Even that Maxis guy who attended to me agreed. He was nodding furiously. Alternatives, alternatives...

I've been doing some research online, and still, I hadn't made up my mind on anything yet.

One fine Saturday, after a hearty lunch, with food filled right up to our throats, we decided to take a walk. We were strolling aimlessly, and ended up in Nokia. I decided to check it out, and so I did.

The heavy glass doors aren't welcoming.

So were the store assistants. Store assistant playing with her own phone But the last thing I need is someone trailing my every move as I check out the phones. It didn't take me a long time to decide which model I wanted. E61 was gigantic, but surprisingly, the buttons were sensitive and responsive. I was messing with the phone when the store assistant approached and asked if she can help. Few basic questions about the functionality of the phone suggested that she wasn't well versed with the functions. Bah. But then she suggested that I take a look at the new E71. I thought that model hadn't arrive. Cos my earlier-in-the morning research said that it was 'coming soon'. So fine.

That dummy unit came full of finger prints. I felt my face was making funny twisted look. Potong stim yang teramat sangat. Hence the name dumb. Talk about exerting class in an upmarket mall. Gah.

I decided to get E71. After all.

The store manager went into the back of the room to get a unit. Not the dummy, it's the real deal. MissStoreAssistant was tasked to get it started up and teach me a thing or two. She had a hard time trying to switch it on. >.< What kind of sales assistant was that? After a change of unit, and some punching of buttons here and there (duh!) she finally managed. I wasn't expecting any explanation from her, cos clearly she didn't know much. After a whole lot of nodding and umms, it's time to pay for it. I was asked to fill out some details for the warranty card, while she prepared the payment slips. Her superior stood by her side, watching. I gave her my credit card and I continued to talk to bro as he played with the phone.

"Excuse me, can I have your IC please?"

(Store manager shot a Puzzled look at her and whispered, why did you ask for people's IC?)

I shot her a double puzzled face. What for?

"I just want to cross check."

For???!

"Match your name."

(Store manager was so embarrassed with the whole drama his suborb was putting up, he apologized to me)

WTF!!!!!!!!!

Clearly, it certainly looked like I stole my dad's credit card to get myself a brand new phone. Ain't it?

For the n-th time, I am damn TL okay.

Say Hi to my new Baby

I'm loving it.

Slurp

2008-07-20T11:44:00.003+08:00

It's good to be home for a while. Very much needed this break from a hectic past week. 14 hours at work per day but I stopped at nothing to live to the fullest each day. What a week it was.

Trees were greener here, air fresher, food taste nicer. The sort of laid back lifestyle. Got some really good sleep, very well deserved and load up some chilli laced spicy food.

Plenty of good laughs.

As for that other matter, I'm just going to take it slow.

Take Me Away

2008-07-18T01:28:00.003+08:00

My insecurities are like shedding leaves.

Let the wind take them where it may.

Honesty is Cruel

2008-07-12T10:02:00.003+08:00

Honesty is a two edged sword.
Being expressive sometimes backfires.
I sometimes forget how others interpret things.
It doesn't always come out the way I meant it.
What have I done?

Permission Granted!

2008-07-09T23:42:00.003+08:00

Sher, *signals to come over.
*I walked over.
Okay. I'm gonna discuss something here. Work related.
*Nods. Uh-huh.
Have you heard of Facebook?
Yeah who doesn't.
Have you ever tried to access Facebook from your *points to the direction of my place*
*Puzzled* Huh? From there? No. Why?
Okay here's what I want you to do.

.
.
.
do research
.
.
.
on possiblity
.
.
.
of doing something with that
.
.
.

(yada yada)

This is Novel ... Facebook is related to Work!

Slow Poke

2008-07-06T13:54:00.003+08:00

KL is not a bad place to start a morning.
When busses are still moving at an acceptable pace, not blowing poisonous carbon monoxide like a bloody chimney while they are not racing buses from other companies to the next stop in a distance. Such nuisance.

Recently, I realised that my attention span (of reading articles in particular) has gone from fairly long to short and now, none. I resort to reading headlines (skim) at the website daily, and conveniently decided to leave it at that. I can't even finish up a short article. As far as I remember, I used to be able to read everything off the internet. Kaypoh news, serious news,relevant or irrelevant articles. Even comments.

But it didn't happen when I was reading books. But, I kept forgetting details and find myself flipping previous pages again (sometimes the entire chapter) altogether. But at least I can go on and on reading without stopping.

I read the headlines, scrolled down as I skimmed through, rolled my eyes and click 'X' on the top right corner.

Is high speed broadband slowing me down?

Moderately Distressed

2008-07-04T22:10:00.002+08:00

I don't know how to deal with this.

I am sad but I'm not angry.
I am disappointed but I'm not giving up hope.
It's not bitter it's not sweet either.
It's not right but I'm not gonna make it right.
But I don't know what else I can do.

Failed to give the bitter of the sweet.

Pause

2008-06-25T21:36:00.002+08:00

You can get so lost in other people's song that at times you forget the existence of your own song.

You get influenced by it.
And allow yourself be carried away.
Cast doubts on yourself.

You let people's song to determine what should have been your own, is this how it should be?

You try to change your song so much that you eventually forget how your own song goes, the way it flows, and what makes the lyrics of your song. At other times, you get tired of listening to people's song that you start to make your song be known, got over the top by your self-declared superiority; you simply tune off people' voice. You go on and on and on singing your tune, but have you ever thought of stopping for just one moment to listen to others? You've got your goals set on something, have others not?

Should you pause and think for a while?

The Moment

2008-06-25T00:16:00.002+08:00

Like a sore thumb.
So strange.
So unusual.
So peculiar.
So accidental.

But still engaging.

Questions

2008-06-22T23:11:00.003+08:00

You want things easy, just ask.
If only it is that simple.
If only things can be answered by asking questions.

The danger of asking questions is that, you're only told things that you are told.
Now my question is, can you trust that? If yes, how much of the whole thing can you trust?

My answer is simple. I trust people easily.
I trust you and I do nothing about the new information I just heard.
It ends here. Ends in me.

I do not have the habit of playing 'God' and try to get my hands on everything and get it right.

Dangling Notes

2008-06-22T22:55:00.003+08:00

I hadn't had that feeling for a very long time.
That very nice feeling of getting out of bed each day and look forward to start the day.
I dug out some addictive songs from my music library and I am now hooked to it.
The morning drive will be pleasant despite all the traffic jams I can foresee.

I think for now, I will just let people's music do the talking.

Intuitive Moments

2008-06-22T03:14:00.002+08:00

It's about moving forward, to acknowledge that skill and to embrace it.

To not be reliant on a skill and technique; it doesn't always work in all situations.

It's also about restraint, to learn how to hold back and when to respond.

It's not all about immediate reactions.

It's about having patience and taking one step at a time.

The Last Straw

2008-06-17T22:00:00.005+08:00

In one way or another, everyone must have had their moments of 'the last straw'.
The final annoyance that's enough to drive you up and over the wall, so much to make you decide that Enough is Enough. For one last time, you've decided, it's for one last time.

People now are much more selfish than they were 10 years ago. People behave in a bizarre ways, react in strange kooky ways. I am one innocent soul.

What was real?

Come to think about it, the difficult time that you made me go through on my own was very selfish of you. Come to think of it now, I felt that those weren't real. All I can think of now is how disgusted I am. I need to look deeper into myself on why I am feeling that way.

How far can you go to forgive someone?

I chuckled over my naivety and yes, I've had my last straw and moved on, what about you?

What comes after this?

2008-06-12T23:12:00.002+08:00

I discovered a different side of myself.

My thoughts are my best company.

Your mind gives you access to alot of things you don't know about yourself.

You can make the world spin backwards in your head.

Books open doors to a vast knowledge.

What personal freedom is, and what it really means to me.

Music.

What's next?

Baaaaa...

2008-06-12T21:44:00.003+08:00

The ScapeGoat

Sometimes people get too comfortable with our job that we sometimes forget that they live paycheck to paycheck. Looking forward to payday each month doesn't seem to ring any alarm. They sit comfortably in their zone. Feeling secure and certain.

What if all of a sudden, they were to lose it all?
They are now face to face with their worst fear; losing their job.

All because he made 6 clicks too many, 6 mere clicks that cost 1.8bil.

All seemed too harmless. It's not the first time the system had faced complications. It has been happening all these while and rerunning it has always solve problems. But this time around, that particular error was generated by a hardware failure that triggered the system's rollback mechanism. It behaved like it should. You see, the thing that non-IT people don't understand is that, when multiple systems were at work, depending on each other, a million and one things could go wrong in between. Unreliable network, database overload, failing disk drives just to name a few.

A legacy system vs a 2 yrs old state of art system. They choose to blame the human. For his error. There's obviously a big loophole in the system.

Why are these people here? They're here with one aim: Prove him guilty. That full action should be taken for that offense.

What the hell are you talking about?

These people came with the intention to convict him. At this point, explanations no matter how technically detailed is not going to do any good, cos non-IT people don't give a shit. They just want a scapegoat, and they're done. It pains me to hear how people from different work backgrounds arguing a point that we all know will never reach a mutual understanding.

It's almost certain that termination will be the conclusion.
Six clicks were all it took.

Read Like You're Rolling

2008-06-09T22:19:00.003+08:00

Politics are boring stuff so I am not going to repeat whatever you can read in TheStar or any other papers you can get your hands on. Whether or not it will be doing us any good what the by election results, damage was done.

Now, leave us alone.

On another note, I have a couple of unfinished books. But I have this little habit of getting new ones before I can finish what I have. Some books are just easy to read, meaning you can just go on and on and on flipping those pages. Some, in my case, I read the same page, same paragraph and the same line over and over again, and I can't seem to go anywhere. Some of the books had this depressing element, but being difficult to read is the whole point, ain't it? I am suppose to learn from understanding difficult things. BAH..c'mon, read on!"

You wouldn't believe this is how I read. Hopeless. Is that how you read difficult books?

Okay. Then I thought maybe I should try something light. So one day, I went through the books on Thamby's shelf (cos all I have in hand are depressing) and picked "Can you keep a secret?" Sophie "Kinlala" Kinsella. Certainly. Before I knew it, I was flipping pages after pages until ... I finally fell asleep at 49. Damn hopeless lor.

Anyway, I've got myself 2 more new books. What did I just say?

Jamie hears a who?

2008-05-22T18:24:00.000+08:00

School uniform sexy, says group

[insert your version of catcall here]

Shallowness

2008-05-22T16:15:00.009+08:00

What I hate about certain mapmakers was the fact that they like to omit 'places' they dim unimportant.

Where the heck is Kedah?

I have a reason to blame them mapmakers for producing Ignorant Malaysians, no?
It's part of the country. Bet your Geography textbook tells more than that. No matter how bad you did at Geography or how sucky your sense of direction is. I can't believe how 'chien' some people could be that they don't know where this state is, let's not ask if they even know Perlis is actually in Malaysia. I am repeating this for the n-th time. (substitute n for any possible variable next to infinity)

For your information.

If you still can't see where. It's hard to believe when people tell me Penang is the north-most state in P.Malaysia. The total-chienness makes me want to strangle them.

And this is where I grew up.

I won't be surprised if people tell me they hadn't seen a paddy field before. Too full of their brick jungle life that they are so reluctant to step out a little and see the world. Very Chien.

Life here is very laid back. I loved every minute of it. The only place I can sleep like there's no tomorrow, is back at home. I can hardly get so much sleep back in KL. Feels different. Food here, you can't get anywhere in KL. Nothing like it. So people ask, why stay in KL if you want to complain? There are sacrifices to make.

Kedah is strategically located near the tip of the peninsular, in short, we're neighbours with Penang and Thailand. An hour down south, we'll land in Penang. How convenient was that?

Do your shopping. Like mad.

Then take a short ferry trip back to mainland. Bye Penang.

Sun and sea breeze.

Also close to my home state, about half an hour up north is the Thai Border.

Dine next to a Thai rubber estate?

By the Lake, surrounded by a forest?

This place is Serene!

Have food sent to you by boat.

Check this out!

Dining area. (bit grainy here..bad camera)

Home sweet home.

Greens

2008-05-08T21:58:00.003+08:00

It's been a while since I log on to Blogger.

Life has been a roller coaster ride.

Things happen so fast that whenever I could find time, sit down and try to blog about it, my old brain can't seem to remember the details in full.

I need to relax.

Victim of Something Potty

2008-04-28T20:25:00.003+08:00

I'm a victim. Of POTHOLES. SS2 pothole. After midnight.

But on the bright side, I am now a certified tyre changer.

For emergencies please call 012-4xxxxxx

A change is good. I am savouring it now. It is worth the wait.

Say HI!

2008-04-14T00:03:00.005+08:00

I am cute. Don't test me.

I was wondering what it'd be like if us human have the growth rate of a rabbit.

1 month from now.

...

Noises that appeal to me.

2008-04-07T22:05:00.008+08:00

I almost forgot that I am a big fan of this.

Eh SHOOT.

No, not that woman.
I meant this. I like their uniform. And check out the drum major. He's smart looking, while the rest are fit enough to be casted for Star Trek. The entire crew for the Enterprise.

Click for larger view. Taken with my trusty Sony Ericsson. But please click "Back" to my blog. Don't leave. =P

This is just the launching of Kuala Lumpur World Marching Band 2008 that will take place months later (in July). Why so early? I don't know. Perhaps Azalina Othman Said's had her schedule full till July or maybe til the next elections.

Anyway she did one amazing thing worth mentioning. For a person so occupied with her work, she obviously didn't quite have the time to prepare for speeches. Of course, having been on the scene for so long, she must have learnt a thing or two about public speaking.

After a whole long wait for the VVIPs to arrive, I finally get to see the band play. I LOVE. But of course before anything starts, some of the VIPs gave short speeches. So when she sat down and started to flip the handbook placed nicely in front of her, I was thinking that, bah, like all other "important" people, they just flip like they care~

Then, it was her turn to address the audience. She grabbed the handbook along. So as she stood there and started out with acknowledgments and some sweet kosong talk. As she was talking, she flips the pages, addressing people's name, fellow VIPs' titles and she made it look so easy. I reckon she cant remember the name of the event itself (cos she flips to the cover and reads aloud). She did all that in a selamba fashion and never once it sound like she's reading, and best all, she didn't pause to think even for one second. -.-"

Flipping pages and made a speech out of it as she flipping.

Now that's worth admiring.

Anyway, before that very cool band played, the VVIPs were welcomed by pipe band of 5 and a drum playing dude led by a sissy drum major.

Wtf. So potong stim. He was suppose to be a most prominent figure compared to the rest of the band. You should see how he hold the baton (did he forgot breakfast lunch and dinner the day before?) and how he swung it upwards and side stepped to catch it, and first thing he adjusted after that big catch, was his bloody hair. And also if you did not know, the drum major was suppose to choreograph the marching movements, which of course he did, just that he made the band do what I now call the "Ant-walk".

Watch closely, there are the band mates and the leader in black. I don't know if its a formation. It's ANTWALK.

I've never seen anything like that in the history of marching band.

I GOT PUNK'D!

2008-03-27T01:12:00.003+08:00

Like I said :-I GOT PUNK'D!!

It's funny how at first I felt ... empty. But after I hung up and reflect abit, I was like WTH, I was gotcha-ed. -.-"

-_________________________________________________-"

It was when everything that happened 2 minutes ago, sank into my sane mind. But you made my day. *grins*

Nice one!

My Arrangement

2008-03-27T00:46:00.003+08:00

I figured a brilliant way of arranging the layout of stores in a mall. Read this.

Name of shops are very the creative these days. They either explicitly include north south east west, or it comes in the form of a "recognizable name" that we can relate to a certain part of the world.

So if we group them together wing by wing, semua solved! Unless, dia tak faham bahasa, itu lain cerita.

Let's see what we've got. Apparels and eateries, cafes and restaurants.

Topman Topshop - On top lah. NORTH!

Little Vietnam. Little Taiwan. Ehh! We have Little Penang too! Erm... All EAST!!

Chinatown Classic - duh, EAST!! (hey, easy peasy)

East India - okay lar, EAST, but closer to Centre Court.

Chilli's - American - WEST!

San Fran! - WEST!

Amarin Heavenly Thai - BAH. EAST

Finnegan's - IRISH! CENTRE!

Hong Kong Kim Gary - EAST!

British India? Er...

Sounds like a plan heh?

East West? Nine West??

2008-03-24T23:37:00.003+08:00

Shopping malls are most Malaysians favourite hang out place. Malls these days are sprawling, an outward extension of a small piece of land, and has almost everything under one roof. So when you have everything under one roof, you've gotta provide good signage, just so people don't get lost in the concrete jungle. Or spend time looking for the store instead of spending their good money at your mall, right?

One mind boggling thing is, why in the world would they still name their crack and crevices East, West, North and South? As if we can tell east west north and south, INDOORS!

*checks portable compass

You see, when we can't tell East, West, North and South indoors, we tell directions by recognizing the stores lining each side. That's a workaround solution. But how many people that you know, actually know the location of each and every store? Most of the people I know would say, meet at Centre Court. Even then, people can't find each other because of their centrepiece. You get my drift.

"Where you at?"
"Im standing in front of GAP."
"Geb? Oh okay! Meet you in a second. I'm on my way up!"
"Up? Where? I'm at GAP!"
"Yeah I know. Geb rite? Just wait. I'll meet you there!"

Okay. I just made that up. But it's a possible confusing situation, you see? People are often reluctant to admit that they have bad sense of direction, leave alone admitting they have a short short-term memory span. Or simply, bad memory. You get my point.

GPS anybody? Or the ole trusty compass? Let's hope their East West North South is really what it is.

When its raining and you've got nothing to do

2008-03-22T15:07:00.002+08:00

Abbr. of the day: EGM
EGM no longer stands for Emergency General Meeting.
Its now: Extraordinary General Meeting.

Wow.
More to come.

Do you want some Goosee?

2008-03-16T23:28:00.003+08:00

In the internet and yes, Facebook age, we don't need money to afford luxuries.

Some things are meant to be shared.

Pete-a-pan

2008-03-15T02:26:00.003+08:00

Politics has never been so interesting. The more diverse it gets, the crazier the story gets. It's like fighting over the who gets more candy and icing on the cake.

Until someone can forget to put their dog in the car. Adoi.

I wasn't aware of Peterpan's new album until Dewa told me about it. He was Peterpan's biggest fan. It's nice to hear that the locals support their own bad, cos they make Good music. I shall try to love our local bands too. Please bring me for gigs. More so if Peterpan or other Indo bands are coming okay? Me love live bands too. So please.

Peterpan

I bought their new album after I came back from Bali. Speaking of Bali, yes, I haven't finish blogging about it. Soon, I promise. After I get the rest of the pictures from my home PC.

What do you think of a person who is ignorant about the ongoings in the country? I always believed that knowing a little something about everything is never a bad thing. I've stood by that, and I embrace that entirely. The Internet is a vast knowledge vault. It's almost boundless. Need I say more?

I've been asked questions that put me in an awkward situation. Of course, my reply wasn't a natural response as I would to a close friend, but rather a calculated response required of someone walking on the edge. It happens so often nowadays that I needn't think it through to come up with it. I can blurt it out with ease. I am still very selective of people I share my life with. Too often I had my trust compromised, can someone tell me why these scheming people are even worth my attention and care? Want to thank my yhsif buddies, I treasure you most.

Life only gets harder when you have choices. Options. You weigh the pros and cons. What is right and wrong. What is needed and what is not. But what if both choices are seemingly just as good, you're forced to make that choice. But how? Gut feeling? Instinct? What feels right at that moment? But when a choice had been made, how often do we have second thoughts on something that had been decided on? And why is it that most of the time, the other option seemed to so much more attractive than the one we've made after we've made that choice?

James Blunt's Same Mistake is a beautiful song.

Helo?

2008-03-13T21:04:00.002+08:00

What comes to mind when you see a confused dog wandering on the streets in an area full of apartments and condominiums?

A lost dog.

Not just some chao kao running around okay? I wouldn't be surprised if I see a non-breed lying by the roadside. It was a Shihtzu. Did someone lose their dog?

For someone living in an apartment to lose their dog shows how irresponsible the owners are. It's not like your dog get to run around in the front porch and was "dognapped". There's no front porch to poo on.

I thought of a couple of potential ways to lose a dog (while living in an apartment):
1) You spent all your money on your breed dog and had none left to buy a leash?
2) He survived a 20 storey high fall.
3) You had your hands full carrying your stuff to your car while your dog tags along. You ordered him to stay and wait. You put all your stuff into your car trunk, hop into the driver seat, and drove off, leaving him behind.

Go figure. It's like forgetting your daughter.

Ordinary People has decided

2008-03-09T09:34:00.003+08:00

Good morning. What does it feels like to wake up to the dawn of a new government? Did the voters did the right thing by putting in more voices in the Parliament? Or was it a brilliant scheme to get voters to deny Dacing a landslide victory, and in the end they were the ones reapoing rewards?

My home state has fallen to PAS. What does the future holds?

*puts on headphone, plays John Legend's Ordinary People*

2008-03-05T23:10:00.004+08:00

Brwahhhh! Did I scare you? Look into my eyes and you shall fall into a trance.
[Bali post to be continued. Soon]

Election Spell

2008-03-05T22:20:00.006+08:00

The election fever is now at its peak. Everywhere you can see banners and posters. Also pondok-pondok for their campaigns. Didn't see them act so fast when the flood hits certain parts of the nation. Nabe. I'm not going to discuss about that today.

When I was a 11, I knew nothing about what elections are for. Why bother voting over who should have the power to lead the country when the successor will still be from the same party? I don't recall getting much explanation from mum and dad, nor did they answer to all my curious questions, politics in particular.

Among my questions;

Why choose a Dacing as a symbol? Dacing has to be very balanced, or else Senget lar!

What has UMNO got to do with Barisan National?

Rocket! Looks like NASA flag. COOL!

More flags/posters/banners = more votes?
How do you know who to vote for when you only see these people coming out to campaign when the elections are near? At other times, what were they doing?
How this, why that, how come???

I have an odd liking for flags. I like to see flags; how they flutter and flap in the wind. On police bikes, the Royals convoy, Sports Day. So when I see those posters hanging freely everywhere, my genius mind hatched a brilliant idea. Make flags out of the posters. God knows what flag I made. Maybe with a candidate's face? Eww. Can't believe I actually did that. And yes, I did get a good scolding from mum for ripping out the posters and bring it home. They scare me with their bomoh and evil spells stories and that I will be put into a trance and they can make me do evil things and obey them. That scare the crap out of me. Me and my 'flags'. My mum's fantastic story.

I'm lucky not to get my mouth taped from asking all those questions. I know how annoying it must have been. I guess they had better ways to entertain me, by Ignoring certain questions. Based on need-to-know basis. I figured that if they were to explain the works of it, I guess a 10 minute thing will end up taking the whole day. I only question things that I have interest in knowing. Most of the time, I do more observation than questioning.

Anyway, by my own intense efforts at reading the news online during my goyang kaki days at le Bank, I picked up useful bits of information. I frequent websites that publish untainted information.

I'm lucky to be in the Internet age.

p/s: eh..my bali post is not finished. =P i know you can wait